What is wrong with me??!!!
I can do 10ks!!!
As my friend Nicky says...
"We can pull a 10k out of our arse when ever we want."
(She's gonna hate that I wrote that!! But it's true!!)
It's so true.
So how come I practically crawled through that 10k today?? (Wellington Marathon 10k).
I'll tell you why.
Because I HATE THAT RUN. I was nervous and in knots. My insides were clenched so tight that every thing hurt. My face, usually set to "happy disposition", was set in a dark grimace.
I hate that run.
Because once it made me feel like I don't belong out there.
So now I'm scared of it.
And the more scared and the more nervous I got, the more wound up I got. So wound up that my legs turned to concrete and my lungs shrivelled up.
Nicky's so good. Keep going she said. Relax she said. It's just a Sunday morning run she said. Then she said... Don't let this run beat you. You beat this run. She said that with 400 meters to go. The finish line was JUST there. And I honestly believe if she hadn't said that I would have stopped. And walked. But with her incredible support and encouragement and totally inappropriate humour I kept going.
I hate being scared. I hate feeling like I don't belong out there.
So next weekend we're gonna run that 10k again.
And I'm not going to just beat it... I'm going to own it.